permission

instead of trying to back up and figure out what i'm grateful for over the past couple of days

instead of trying to come up with excuses and figuring out who I'm really talking to

instead of all that ...Im just showing up.  right here. as i am.

i have to say i'm a bit sad.  but grateful.

i'm feeling frustrated and incapable. but grateful.

i'm feeling lonely.  but grateful.

i'm feeling anticipation. but grateful.

i'm feeling like all i want to do is crawl into bed and wake up in the spring. but i'm grateful.

i know what i have, i know what it means.  i'm grateful.