leaping*

I have to admit I didn't think much about today, that it's the 29th of February and Leap Year and all...but after reading some others and really letting myself think about what today means I felt like today was a gift.  Everyday is a gift, I know...but today well, it was a gift of 24 hours and it was worth a few words from me. 

As you may of gathered I'm struggling a bit ...with life, with my future and I truly do not want to be here.  I feel like I don't know what it means to be happy, to stay there, to let it seap into my bones.  And I'm here to say I'm ready for that kind of happiness, that kind of joy and for it to stick around.

I do acknowledge that over the years I now can see when I start down this spiral and catch myself before it gets too bad.  I've learned to ask for help. To seek it out.  To take measures for self care. 

Today...gave me bits of gratitude, laughter and moments of bliss...