i remember a time when i would work at my desk job all day just to come home to get on the computer for my own self and blog, taking my photos that I had taken from the weekend before or from a lunch time jaunt. that was way back in 2004.  wow, that was a long time ago ~ so much has changed and thank god. 

i am one that craves change, always but also likes the routine of life too.  it's all ying and yang, wabi sabi..not sure where to go with the thoughts i have tonight but i'm feeling really imperfect in a good way. realizing what i do isn't perfect, far from it really and looking at others like they are perfect is dead wrong. they aren't, they have their own issues and we all know it. whether they tell them or not. we know no one is perfect and if it looks like they are, well then they are FAR from it.

so what i come here tonight with is a little bit of self love, accepting where i have come from, all the roads that led me here, to right here in this bed. it's all a journey right?  it's all what it's supposed to be and sometimes i can't figure out exaclty where it is i am and why, it usually shows up soon after.

so many people/friends doing amazing and wonderful things and i need to accept that i'm doing the same. raising two amazing young girls is my wonderful job, the place i need to be, the place i chose to be then.. and now.  however hard it is, however unpatient i can be, however awful i think i am's where i need to be, they need me and if i was really honest, i need them.

i've been "looking at the big picture" with some close friends as of late and its about time i took a step back and did the same for myself.